Hello Kitty!


This is a story that happened quite a while ago, around 2-3 years kida. I was on my way to Dubai and flying British Airways because they used to have the cheapest tickets. Their planes suck and they don’t serve you anything on the short haul flights, like Muscat-Dubai. Anyway, we were on the bus taking us to the plane. I parked myself at the far end of the bus where there's that elevated area just low enough to sit on, and faced the rest of the bus to observe those coming in. It wasn’t a full flight, and eventually a family of Brits containing one set of parents, one pair of boys and one pair of girls boarded the bus. The dad was a thin, tall guy with greying hair, and his wife had those Samira Donya eyebrows going on. The boys had their backpacks on and looked cool and bored. The girls looked younger; one looked around 8-ish and was pulling a bright pink Hello Kitty bag behind her. Apparently her name was Olivia, as her mother called her. The younger girl looked like a slightly over-grown doll with pale blond hair all done up in curls and pale blue eyes, and wasn’t pulling anything.

'Olivia, you were very strong lifting that bag all by yourself!' The Brits are all about praising their kids. The boys ignored Olivia and continued with their chitchat, as both parents beamed down on their pretty little daughters. Naturally, it was important to praise Dolly as well.

'Dolly, you also did a good job-' Samira stopped in mid-sentence.

'Sajami! Where's Dolly's Hello Kitty bag?!' Everyone looked around, and then at Dolly-without-the-Hello-Kitty-bag. There was no Hello-Kitty bag anywhere to be seen.

'Dolly? Where's your red Hello-Kitty bag?' Dolly looked clueless and lost. She didn’t know where she had left the red Hello Kitty bag. Parents started to get agitated, wondering if they had left it in the bathroom? At the waiting hall? Near the cafe? Where could it be? And the plane was taking off in a very short while! Sajami sajami sajami! Samira started gesturing wildly to the lady who was checking the passports at the gate hall, shouting the way people shout at people who they think are deaf or can't understand what language you're speaking. The lady was Philipino.

'Excuse me! We are LOOKING for a RED Hello Kitty bag! We MIGHT HAVE LEFT IT in the BATHROOM or in the HALL or NEAR THE CAFE! Excuse me!' The Philipino lady looked back and tried to hear what Samira was saying about the lost bag, and Samira continued to shout out descriptions of the red Hello Kitty bag, as if thinking that the bag, hearing itself being described so clearly, would get up from wherever it was sitting and wheel itself into view. Meanwhile, tall thin Dad was trying to get Samira's attention to take his passport, get off the bus and go look for the bag. All this time, Dolly was looking fearfully along, her blue eyes getting bigger and bigger as the problem finally sunk into her blond little brain. Her Hello Kitty bag had gotten lost. The red one. And she had lost it. And now everyone was so upset! Obviously, it was too much for one pink/blond little Brit to handle, and she burst out crying.

'WAAAAAAAAAAAA3333333!!!!!!!!'

It was horrible, and that voice was something that would come out of a 60 year old man being exorcised from an evil spirit.

'WAAAAAAAA33333!!!!! HELLO KITTY BAAAAAAAAAG!! WAAAA33!!!!!'

Of course, being British, the 'kitty' in 'Hello Kitty' was pronounced without the T in the middle, coming out as 'Ello Ki'y instead, making it all the more dramatic. Dad had finally gotten Samira's attention, pulled his passport out of her bag and heroically jumped off the bus, rushed past the Philipino lady and out of sight. Samira thought it necessary to comfort her hysterical little Dolly and kneeled down next to her, smoothing her hair and saying: 'it's alright, Daddy's going to get the Hello Kitty bag, it's alright', in a loud dramatic voice. The brothers leaned against the posts looking on at this elaborate show, obviously unmoved. They coolly discussed all the exciting events that had happened to them throughout this trip, counting them off their fingers. It sounded like 4 in total. All this time, I had been perched on my counter, trying (and failing) to hide my laughter at these events. And then suddenly, the doors closed and the bus started moving. Dolly, who had not stopped crying since she had started, almost had a heart attack.

'NOOOOOOO!!!!! DADDY NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!'

Apparently she thought the bus was whisking them off the England and her daddy was being left behind. Him and the red Hello Kitty bag.

'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! NAUGHTY BUS! NAUGHTY BUS!!!!! DADDDDYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!'

I think I fell off the counter min shidat aldi7ik alkan shari6ni. Remember the British accent: no T in the middle!

Anyway, Dolly was eventually calmed down after we had arrived at the plane and they had gotten into their business class seats while I trudged towards my usual location at the back of the plane with my fellow economiers. Being on a fixed budget sucks. I've been on a fixed budget my whole life, walbusiness da binshimo saaaakit! Quite a while later, Dad appeared on the plan, red Hello Kitty bag in hand. I was too far off to see Dolly's reaction, but could pretty well imagine it.

And that was my adventure on British Airways, which turned out to be the last time I ever flew BA.

Comments

  1. Oh dear! ... u r a gr8 story teller sis ^_^... i almost felt like being there :). ..

    i like :)

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  2. Hi Reem, hysterically funny and lively! Nice read. I've just published a novel, Nile Blues, about the separation of Sudan. If you're interested, I could send you a copy. Maha

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  3. Given there is no such thing as a "British accent" this is just ridiculous. If you are so clued up on British Airways/British habits/British behaviour/British children (who I would imagine are not really any different to any other children around the world when they lose something precious to them) you would know there is no such thing as a British "accent".
    And as for your comment about her eyebrows - appearances really important to you are they? Not that your comment is in anyway judgmental or anything.
    Sorry but two words come to mind with this little lambast you give about your apparent short journey on a "British Airways" flight (oh the horror of it - what's Sudan's national carrier known as again? Was it something like "Sudden Death Airways" ? - will stick with BA any day over them, at least they tend to reach their intended destinations) and those words are: chip & shoulder.
    Interesting take by someone, whom I suspect has spent little time in the UK.

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  4. Anonymous...do u come from china ? That's the only explanation for your ignorance when stating there is no british accent...what a hater ! I take it from ur comment above u have a personal problem with the writer

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  5. @The commenter who looked like he/she might have had a heart attack by the writer's harmless usage of the words "British Accent":

    The Scottish have their own accent, the Welsh have their own accent, the English have their own accent(s) I'm sure the blogger is aware of this because contrary to what you may think she is a person that possesses a brain. Does she have to satisfy your overinflated ego by pin pointing the exact geographical origin of this "British" family through the dialect they were speaking? Many people nowadays use the terms British Accent/American Accent simply to indicate where the person (people) they're talking about is (are) coming from. It may be inaccurate but is still overlooked because it's not as disastrous as those that think they know how to speak English yet seem to be massacring it every time they do so.

    Instead of giving constructive criticism to the writer...one she could maybe benefit from in future posts you resorted to arrogant bullying. Get over yourself :)

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  6. Hilarious responses. I am actually British so I am more than aware of regional accents - and the fact that a "British" accent per se simply does not exist.

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  7. Anonymous..give it a rest...u could be even chinese..judging by your approach & comments..I don't think u'd know a brit even if u see 1 infront of u..let alone be a brit..in a way the writer should be given credit for giving people like urself room & space 2 vent & act like you know what u r talking about..anonymous DRAMA !

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  8. Anonymous - you are far from a Brit
    clue: you actually recognized the author's reference to the "Samira" eyebrows!! lol!!

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  10. too funny!! love your posts :)

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  11. Waaay waaay waaay... Mutta bildhi7ik. There were tears. Tears! Loved the family drama. Imagine the parallel Sudanese universe with the missing bag. Nada!

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